It’s the new craze sweeping the nation: bedecked in cricket gear, waving bells and handkerchiefs, the youth of today are obsessed with Morris Dancing. Whilst it may seem harmless, kids sucked into the heady world of English traditional dance risk social ostracisation, as well as significant bell related injuries.

Parents should be vigilant in order to protect their children from this menace. Keep an eye out for the tell-tale signs – skipping everywhere, singing about rolling hills, hanging out with bearded men are common, but teens may also invest in accordions and ribbons.

Those teens wishing to share info about upcoming Morris gigs, as well as erecting maypoles, might resort to text speak in order to confuse their parents. The following is a list of the most common acronyms used to conceal teens’ true meanings.

  • DTF – Dance the Folksyway
  • FTW – Feasting til Whitsun
  • WTF – Wave the Fiddle
  • BRB – Baldrics to Bellpads
  • G2G – Get to Goldsmiths’
  • STFU – Spangly Tights Forsale – URGENT
  • IRL – Intriguing Ribbon Loop
  • IIRC – It Isn’t Really Cool