Excellent ways to name your pets: Volume IV

Fido, Spot, Whiskers the cat, Daisy the cow, Ryan the bearded dragon. Do you ever feel like you’re stuck in a loop, as far as naming your nonhuman companions is concerned?

Look no further than this, the fourth instalment in what is soon to be Britain’s premier pet naming guide.

Excellent ways to name your pets.

Nicknames of Prime Ministers.

I was trawling the Web last night, checking out this “Wikipedia” my friends are so crazy about, when I stumbled onto my second favourite page in existence: this list of UK Prime Ministerial nicknames. Representing the age-old tradition of ripping the piss out of whoever’s in charge, the list of names go from the hilarious to the nonsensical, from the sycophantic to the plain brutal.

(In case anyone is interested, this is my first favourite webpage. It’s a Sheffield city forum. The thread begins with a guy asking where he can get 10,000 freshly dead wasps from, and in the following 51 pages, he refuses to answer anyone’s questions about why he wants them. It’s well worth a read.)

Here are my top picks for PM-based pet names:

  • Finality Jack
  • Lord Pumicestone
  • God’s Only Mistake
  • The Spodulator
  • Ramshackle Mac
  • The Grey Man

And last but not least:

  • Horny Henry, the Mince-Stuffed Budgerigar

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